Do you remember the last time you made a purchase that made your whole body happy?That tingle, that constant smile, that pure joy?
I do.
I remember buying my first Z3 3.0 litre in black, As I drove it off the forecourt, I knew—logically—I had just lost money I’d never recoup.But I didn’t care. Because in that moment, the joy outweighed the cost.
It made no sense on paper, but it made perfect sense in my soul.
And this is the thing about alignment. It often looks bonkers to everyone else.
People will tell you:
❌ "That’s not a smart financial decision.
❌ "You should play it safe.
❌ "Why would you take that risk?"
But deep down, you know the truth. Some choices aren’t about logic. They’re about life.
The Tension Between Alignment & Approval
For 20 years, I made bold choices like that one.But not nearly enough of them.
Because approval has a sneaky way of creeping in. It makes you hesitate. Second guess. It tells you to shrink a little, adjust a little, compromise just enough to stay in the good graces of others.
And over time?That’s how we lose ourselves.
We stop making decisions that make our souls tingle.We trade our inner knowing for external validation.We choose acceptance over authenticity.
And the worst part? We convince ourselves it’s the "right" thing to do.
How to Tell If You’re Living for Approval
If just thinking about making a heart-led decision makes you feel sick, that's a clue.
Alignment doesn’t always feel comfortable at first—it stretches you.But dis-alignment? That’s the slow, silent kind of discomfort that builds over years.
Ask yourself:
Do you regularly make decisions that light you up—even if they don’t make sense to others?
Are you living from a place of what’s possible for you, or what’s expected of you?
If you had to choose between following your gut or keeping others happy, what would you do?
Because here's the truth: Alignment isn't the easy choice. It's the right one.
PHIT: A Framework for Living in Alignment
This is why I built the PHIT framework—to help people check in with themselves and course-correct when approval starts taking over.
✅ P – POSSIBLE → What’s actually possible when you stop seeking approval?
❤️ H – HEART-CENTRIC → Are you living by what lights you up or what keeps others comfortable?
🎯 I – INTENTION → Are you making decisions that align with your truth?
🚀 T – TAKE OFF → Will you actually follow through and choose YOU?
For years, I didn’t always pass my own test.But now? I do.
Because as Oscar Wilde said:"Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken."
So now, I pass the question to you:Are you really choosing you?
Or are you choosing the version of you that pleases them?
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